So, my ex boyfriend had a friend who killed himself just about 3 weeks ago. It hit my boyfriend really hard and he started to change. He got quieter and quieter and soon wasn’t even the person I had been dating for a year. I finally asked him if he even wanted to be with me, and he replied “Its not that I don’t want to be with you, I just feel empty”. He ended the relationship saying he needs to figure out how to fix himself and fill the hole he has inside him, but he wants to do that alone. I really do not know what to do at this point. He messaged me twice. Once was asking how I was doing, and the other was him telling me I was welcome to see the cats if i ever wanted to (we owned cats together) so I guess I want to know if this advise you have given in this article is going to work. Because I honestly think he is really confused and doesn’t know what he feels. I would appreciate any advise!
Males can sometimes have this tendency where we internalize our thoughts and emotions too much, that something may be bothering him but he never said it out, and in the end only acted upon his feelings without really giving you a chance to explain or understand what was going through his mind. Perhaps you could ask him and try to find out what it is, and whether its something that can be worked on together.
Hi Lauren again... Well, quite some time passed by, we broke up 3 and a half months ago. I did try all this what you recommend here: waited, wrote the apology letter, asked him if we could talk about what could I have done better. This is what happened: we met for a coffee and had a good talk, just general catching up and casual subjects, however he didn't mention anything about our relationship and I didn't want to push him. It was a friendly time, with some sparks still there. Then we continued in email, I asked him again about what has gone wrong between us, to which he responded that it was mainly about HIM: he was too stressed about certain things in his life that had nothing to do with me. And mentioned a couple of concerns about me, but they were not anything serious. Then HE suggested that we should meet and discuss it, he will be happy to see me - but another month passed by and he didn't seem to be able to fit me in his extremely busy work schedule and stress and I indeed knew that they had something going on in the company. I was very understanding and not pushy at all. Maybe I was way too patient and gave him too much time: tonight, I saw him with another woman, walking in town, holding hands... Now, we will still meet once, because I forgot something at his place. I am totally clueless of how to behave toward him. Shall I pretend that I don't know anything and wait till he brings up that he already has somebody else, or shall I confront him? The worst thing is that he is one of the last men on Earth I would expect to be dishonest. What shall I do now? Now I am close to 50 and I have never been so happy with a man than with him, in fact, he was the first one I could have imagined to grow old with, and he used to be also very happy and planning a wonderful life together. And now I am in quite a shock. Thank you in advance! ...

He says that he was not comfortable being at his trueself with me. we were in a relationship for 3 years and now he says this.He's way too inconsistent about his thoughts and gives a list of reasons for the break up and he wants to be only FRIEDS with me at least for a while. it's been almost 4 months since we broke up, I've been pleading him all this while and today I decided to Start No Contact period for at least 2 - 3 months until December. Kindly help me in getting him back. I'm very much serious about this guy.Also please Suggest me if i'm doing it right.


It was then that I started NC (I had to tell him what I was going to do because we call and text so often). I'm hoping that this will work because I do want him back, but he seemed very unhappy (and slightly angry) when I told him that his actions are confusing me but he cannot make a decision on which girl to go for. And honestly, I was hoping during this NC, he will learn how to live without me (and vice versa). However, this situation is different as he has another girl to console him. Will this still work out happily for me?
I was devastated for a few days and cried and begged and pleaded but afterwards I realised it was a stupid idea. Then I started accepting the break but still had thoughts like 'maybe his depression affected his decision' or 'maybe when we meet, he'll rethink it.' He was academically smart but not emotionally smart and I was the other way. It took him a long time to figure out that he liked me too when we were best friends. I also realised it's a stupid idea to think that way because he made his intentions clear for now. I apologised for my actions after the breakup and told him that I'll try my best to be his best friend but...
Try answering these questions: Do you miss your ex, or do you miss having a boyfriend or girlfriend? Did he or she make you feel better about yourself, more secure in the world, and happier? Do you imagine yourself with this person in the long-term, even when the excitement of being in love has worn off and you are stuck in the daily routines of life? If you are only missing the security of having someone and the excitement of a dramatic relationship, you can find those things with someone else in a healthier, more stable relationship.

If you feel that he is unable to give you the attention you need, perhaps it would be better to focus on moving on as he may not be right for you. However, if this is a temporary phase and you think that it would get better, then maybe giving both parties a break right now by doing no contact would be good since it allows for some breathing room and for him to focus on what he needs to do right now, while you figure out whether his lack of attention towards you is something you're able to accept.
That needs to change. We need to get you behaving and coming across in a more attractive manner, when you meet up with her in person. This takes practice so it is something you should get started with right away as soon as you begin the No Contact Period. That way, when you go to meet with her after no contact, she’s gonna ‘just feel’ that you have a sexier presence. That’s how it works, women can’t explain this stuff, they ‘just feel it’.

He ultimately took two weeks, and over the course of a few days worked up the courage to tell me that he wanted to focus on his career for the next few years and did not have that special feeling to invest more time in a serious relationship. I was blindsided at the time because I felt like he had put so much effort in to courting me, but tried to be mature. I told him that I think he misunderstood what I was asking for and wanting to figure out with him and that I didnt feel he was open enough during out time together to experience something very special...but if ultimately that is how he feels then I respect his decision. I said I would really miss him but I enjoyed the time we spent together very much and I would eventually wish him all the best. I also mentioned I would be deleting his number for my own sanity. He never responded and I have not heard from him since.
This is eerily similar to the EX2 System, but can yield results. As an actual person that's used the method, I got stunning results after only a week, however, I should have pushed it out another week and it would have been much more effective and could have resulted in us getting back together, rather than meeting up and having sex in my Mustang one last time.
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After my boyfriend of one year broke up with me, I could barely speak without crying. I felt blindsided and didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know if I could get him back and the anxiety was unbearable. I booked a call with Coach Lee, not knowing fully what to expect but knowing I needed somebody who had been there before. I wanted our relationship back and so I wanted to make sure I had all the guidance and resources possible to do that. Coach Lee was simply wonderful. His presence is calming and I could tell that he genuinely cared. The things that he suggested I do to get [my boyfriend] back seemed difficult, but Lee warned me that they might be. But I knew I wanted to get him back, so I followed the plan that Coach Lee laid out for me. Within the week, we were back together and we are so in love! I know that it doesn’t always happen that quickly, but Coach Lee said he thought that, in my case, it could happen that soon – and it did! I’m so grateful and can say that if you have been broken up with and want to get that person back, Coach Lee is the best! I’ll never forget how much he helped me!   -Anna
If you’re really worried that your ex is going to get into a new relationship, or you know he’s in one and you want to find out whether it’s real or not, this article will give you the signs that his new relationship is a rebound. That way, you can get a definitive answer to the question, “Is he in a rebound relationship?” and move on with putting the no contact rule to work for you.
I know.  You are thinking to yourself, “look, I came here to find out the fastest way possible to get my ex boyfriend back where he belongs.  I have to have him back”.  But trust me, things are probably pretty crazy right now if you are just coming out of the breakup, so don’t make it worse by rushing through things, being overly impulsive , and doing or saying something you will regret later.

Don't put too much pressure on yourself. Though you should avoid making the same mistakes, if you're constantly obsessing over not making them, you won't be able to enjoy the relationship. Just have fun and try not to think about it too much unless you're having a conflict. If you're so worried that you'll lose him again every step you take, you won't be able to live in the moment.
Whether if you’re madly in love with your significant other or looking to get your ex back it is very important for you to be aware of the power struggle. You also must continuously adjust according to the dynamics that you are both in; at times let go and other times take a stand and be a bit tougher with the one you love; out of love for them and to save your relationship from itself!
This is such garbage. Look at what you’ve written: you must be tremendously happy being single with all your options open, so you can find a guy to get tied down with which will make you tremendously happy. Forget this obsession with ‘happiness’, it is a magazine-culture poisonous idea. Accept that you will go through misery after a breakup, if you lived them, but that you will heal. Take it from me, many guys cannot stand these ‘perfectly happy’ women, they can smell a rat a mile off and know it’s fake. Guys realise there is pain in life, and that women go through it as much as they do.

Get Your Ex Back Using Social Media


If I were you ... I would find someone more like YOU. Someone who takes their time out to travel a distance to see their loved one. Someone who is faithful and won’t leave their boo or their friends to hook up with someone else. And someone who cares enough to write a blog on here about it. I hope for ur sake, u don’t contact this person ever again and be very brief if they contact you. Because everything u just stated seemed like a full circle and it will continue to happen because all this guy will ever think about u is ... “well I messed up before and he took me back. So I guess a few more won’t hurt.” But it has. He has lost respect for u. So either ignore him until he really realizes that he has lost you .... or just try to find someone a little more serious and warm hearted as yourself. Good luck to u. And I wish u the best.
I managed to push him away he has now told me he needs time and space which is killing me inside… We also worked so well together but as soon as we were apart I would think he is cheating on me etc… I now I can see how stupid I was for bringing all the hurt and distrust into this relationship… I just hope I haven’t lost him forever… How are you coping?
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How To Know If Your Ex Wants To Get Back Together


Dear Lauren, My ex broke up with me about 3 weeks ago and I just started no contact about a week ago. We were dating over 3 years. I have a college class with her and ironically sit next to her. How do I continue no contact when I see her everyday? The night before she decided to move out she told me she wanted us. The next night she went out after work and told me we were done, and she never came home. We had been living together for over a year now and finally moved into our own place. I'm pretty sure she slept with a guy she had been casually seeing from work the night before she never came home. I know she slept with him and I know we are over but I was her only sexual partner ever. How do I get her to see the good times we had and miss me? I really want her back and think we can be stronger than ever. ...

My ex and I broke up a few days ago because he said with him working and not being able to see me as much that he couldn't show me the respect he wanted but he still has stong feelings for me. We agreed to wait about 3-4 weeks to see how his work schedule is going and if it'll be good for us to get back together. But I'm still confused on what to do in that time.

Take a leap of faith and do exactly what your ex suggests that you should do to move on. Obviously you shouldn’t take it all the way and really move on altogether or never reach out to them again. But let them doubt for a few weeks or even a few months if you were on the brink or divorced after a long marriage; push them to the brink to see if they are really capable of assuming their words.

Maybe he texts you a generic, “Hey, how are you?” If he really misses you, he might even call. Or, maybe you text or call (but remember, this is after a period of no contact that lasts at least four weeks). At this point, there are no hard and fast rules to follow. In fact, there are no rules when it comes to dating in general. Remember before when we talked about people putting on deodorant and perfume on to disguise body odor instead of taking a bath first… well, that’s the same as employing rules that don’t align with where you truly are mentally.


You'll have to try and figure out what it was that made him break up so suddenly with you before you can determine the steps to take. For the time being, focus on self-recovery and pick yourself up from the breakup and perhaps even come to terms with it. If not, you won't be able to take the proper steps in trying to win him back. You can apply no contact for now, and when you've recovered, to attempt in re-connecting with him. Hopefully by that stage he would have unblocked you and be more receptive towards you.
But going through difficulties is what gets us in touch with who we are and what we’re made of. This sort of growth and self-discovery is invaluable. Breaking through that feeling of “I won’t be able to survive without him” and then discovering that you can will make you realize how strong you are, and as a result, will help build your self-esteem and give you that amazing “I can get through anything” feeling.
Look, I know how hard it is to not contact the one person on this earth you want to see and speak to more than anyone else. I fully get it. But just because we want something doesn’t mean it’s in our best interest to go after it. It’s like going to the gym. Sometimes it’s really hard to summon the strength to get yourself there, but you do it because your goal is to be fit and healthy. Here, your goal is to get your ex back and have a healthy, loving, mutually fulfilling relationship. That can only come about when you’ve taken time to gain clarity and perspective.
He says that he was not comfortable being at his trueself with me. we were in a relationship for 3 years and now he says this.He's way too inconsistent about his thoughts and gives a list of reasons for the break up and he wants to be only FRIEDS with me at least for a while. it's been almost 4 months since we broke up, I've been pleading him all this while and today I decided to Start No Contact period for at least 2 - 3 months until December. Kindly help me in getting him back. I'm very much serious about this guy.Also please Suggest me if i'm doing it right.
my ex and i broke up a couple of months ago. He broke up with me because he did not want a relationship anymore and i cheated on him. We dated for almost two years..After our break up he wanted to be friends and i didn’t. i want to be more and this kept going back and forth. We did hu a couples of times and he would say i love you. He said he wanted something more but not a relationship and not exclusive. I told we can talk to be something or we don’t talk anymore so we agreed on not talking.. We were on good terms and we said i love you and stop talking for a few days. But i texted and he said he doesn’t want to talk to me and he doesn’t want to be friends anymore.. so i need advice should i just give him time and see what happens? what should i do? I still have feeling for this guy and i don’t know if he even does.
My name is Christina and I’m only 18 years old. I like anime, which is how my boyfriend Paul and I started dating – we went to school together and one day exchanged DVD’s of anime we both liked. Then we began to go to anime festivals and gatherings together, watch movies at his house or my dorm room. He was the first man for me, although I was not the first for him. He had more experience and something to compare our relationship with. I was a good girl, who didn’t think much about men before I met Paul. All I really thought about was anime.
Yes, there are certain rules even for your mini date/meet up or whatever you want to call it. As stated above, you want to keep this meet up as casual as possible. Don’t plan to meet over a nice dinner. I suggest getting coffee at Starbucks with chairs and couches where the two of you can just sit and talk. Another great idea would be to meet up at a park and go for a walk together. Honestly, the dates I have enjoyed the most wasn’t anything super romantic it was just when I was enjoying the company of someone else and walking around.
A lot of experts employ the so-called “No Contact” phase when it comes to getting your ex back. This is one of the best ways to convey to him or her that you’re over the break up. Secondly, as you talked about in this article… rebuilding your image is also very important. Being down and depressed isn’t going to help you get your ex back. Re-inventing yourself and your image will!
In my career, many girls keep on mentioning either one of above issues to explain the reason for their breakup. It is very important to keep in mind that your relationship doesn’t come to an end just because you said certain words or did something that lead to breakup. If your relationship with your ex boyfriend was base on solid foundation then few words or actions can’t come over the long work you did before.

Two weeks ago I hit him. He became very angry and said that it was too late for me. After that we have hung and cuddled, as usual. He's going to London in a few days and we're still not together again. I'm afraid I've broken my chances by hitting him and making drama. I do not know how to do "no contact" when he is in another country, busy with studies. Can you help me? He says he still loves me, but lacks sparkle. He also thinks that it's a lot of drama and I'm rushing things. He says he will still hang and talk. But it will not work for me, I will become insecure and make more drama. What shall I do?
Many relationships go through a loss of attraction after being together for some time. You have to figure out and comprehend the reasoning behind this loss of attraction, and whether there are ways you can go about turning it around to re-ignite the flame he once had for you. 30 days should be enough considering that the relationship didn't end on a terrible note.
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